I have come back and forth to Jenny a few times over the years, and now I'm back again. I'm sure I'm not the only one out there who thought that I would NEVER be at the weight I am. I lost weight after having both of my kids, but after some hard knocks by life, lots of emotional eating, a metabolism that I'm sure is slowing down, I'm around 80 pounds above my ideal weight. Even writing those words is just crazy to me! In my mind I still think, "It's not that bad." And thats why I most likely keep going out and overeating. I always LOVE to read peoples stats, journeys, and success stories, so I'm going to give you mine. I'm 36, two kids (9 and 6, so the baby weight excuse isn't holding up in the same way anymore), I am 5'1, and I currently weight 217. DEAR GOD. My goal weight is 130. My first goal weight is 160. My first first goal weight is 195. I just want to get out of the 200's. I've tried all the diets out there, but the fact is that I just can't come to grips about doing a ketosis plan again, or some plan where 'calories don't matter' as long as I'm eating certain things, or even a plan where I have to cook and meal plan right now. I've got so much going on in my life that the idea of grabbing something out of the freezer and knowing that if I eat it (and not anything else) I WILL lose. Its about patience for me, and getting comfortable that it won't happen overnight. Its about getting comfortable with not eating as much as I want, and about just not stopping. I started Jenny again last week, but I honestly wasn't prepared for how hungry I was going to be. It shocked me. I was stressed several times and I thought, its not really going to matter if I eat more, or eat off plan, and just fell right into my excuses again. And guess what, I gained two pounds. Talk about going in for your week 1 weigh in and gaining weight. Hard to justify that one in your head. The bottom line is that the only person I'm letting down is myself. I can use this time or I can waste this time. Chose to use it, start again, and give myself some tough love. I want to be able to run with my kids, wear the millions of clothes in my closet that are so flipping cute but don't fit. I want to do the things I want to do in life, hike, swim, dress up, feel pretty and confident, without my weight being an ever present issue. I also want to LIVE for a long time, and experience actual health.

2013 my HW (303 lbs.) vs. 2019 my Current Weight (218 lbs.)

Synergy noun two or more organizations, substances, or other agents to produce a combined effect greater than the sum of their separate effects. I've discovered the perfect podcast to support me on my weight loss journey. Today my weigh in was 139.5 which is a number I've not seen in decades and just 3 lbs from goal. After 6 months of ups and downs of Week 1-2-3-4 rotations --- I am so close to actually doing it! I can hardly believe it! So close to actually reaching a goal and not quitting after a few weeks (or days). Heck Ya! This feels awesome. But I'm scared. Scared of what will happen when I step off the JC track and start to plan and prepare my own diet plans and meals. What will I do to keep up the momentum and HOW will I do? Lucky for me that I discovered a podcast that resonates deeply and brings me the realization that to move beyond the diet I need to end my habits of emotional eating and over eating. Why do I eat when I'm not hungry? Why do I get urges at 4pm like clockwork to start eating and eating? Sometimes I can't stop myself! What can I do to save me from myself? The podcast Real Weight Loss Real Woman ( realweightlossrealwomen.com) has been a game changer for me and I now see a path forward - building on what I've learned and how I have changed through my months on Jenny Craig diet. The coach, Cookie Rosenblum, gets me and challenges the very behaviors that I see struggle with today. I am evolving in my weight-loss journey from aiming for a number on a scale to having a goal to be a naturally slender woman eating my own natural diet. Ending my emotional eating and bad binge habits. I would never have come this far without Jenny Craig and it is so exciting to feel the synergy and power within me.

So.. I have a new Love - The Peloton Bike. Somehow I was inspired to paint the logo... SO I bought canvas and Paint. Next thing you know I went to an art fair and found an instructor. So we painted pears.. still work in processes....Now I paint at home (and at class) abstracts and Peloton logos.... SO here are a few of my fun paintings. So far I have hung the Peloton Logos and 1 abstract. Love this. And its a good way to focus on something besides eating. Food is fuel - and jenny food over veggies (spiced up) is ok by me.. sure I have excursions - but I must remember life is NOT about the food. There's nature, love, art, friends, family, health, books, Jasper (the cat) and Netflix (binging on Queen of the South at present)... SO guys drink some water, sit back and see the true beginner have some fun with Acrylic. If you want to play - there's a ton of YouTubes out there

his young woman called Holly Butcher posted her advice to the world, 24 hours before she died of cancer. This was her message... “It’s a strange thing to realise and accept your mortality at 26 years young. It’s just one of those things you ignore. The days tick by and you just expect they will keep on coming; Until the unexpected happens. I always imagined myself growing old, wrinkled and grey- most likely caused by the beautiful family (lots of kiddies) I planned on building with the love of my life. I want that so bad it hurts. That’s the thing about life; It is fragile, precious and unpredictable and each day is a gift, not a given right. I’m 27 now. I don’t want to go. I love my life. I am happy.. I owe that to my loved ones. But the control is out of my hands. I haven’t started this ‘note before I die’ so that death is feared – I like the fact that we are mostly ignorant to it’s inevitability.. Except when I want to talk about it and it is treated like a ‘taboo’ topic that will never happen to any of us.. That’s been a bit tough. I just want people to stop worrying so much about the small, meaningless stresses in life and try to remember that we all have the same fate after it all so do what you can to make your time feel worthy and great, minus the bullshit. I have dropped lots of my thoughts below as I have had a lot of time to ponder life these last few months. Of course it’s the middle of the night when these random things pop in my head most! 1) Those times you are whinging about ridiculous things (something I have noticed so much these past few months), just think about someone who is really facing a problem. Be grateful for your minor issue and get over it. It’s okay to acknowledge that something is annoying but try not to carry on about it and negatively effect other people’s days. 2) Once you do that, get out there and take a freaking big breath of that fresh Aussie air deep in your lungs, look at how blue the sky is and how green the trees are; It is so beautiful. Think how lucky you are to be able to do just that – breathe. 3) You might have got caught in bad traffic today, or had a bad sleep because your beautiful babies kept you awake, or your hairdresser cut your hair too short. Your new fake nails might have got a chip, your boobs are too small, or you have cellulite on your arse and your belly is wobbling. Let all that **** go.. I swear you will not be thinking of those things when it is your turn to go. It is all SO insignificant when you look at life as a whole. I’m watching my body waste away right before my eyes with nothing I can do about it and all I wish for now is that I could have just one more Birthday or Christmas with my family, or just one more day with my partner and dog. Just one more. 4) I hear people complaining about how terrible work is or about how hard it is to exercise – Be grateful you are physically able to. Work and exercise may seem like such trivial things … until your body doesn’t allow you to do either of them. I tried to live a healthy life, in fact, that was probably my major passion. Appreciate your good health and functioning body- even if it isn’t your ideal size. Look after it and embrace how amazing it is. Move it and nourish it with fresh food. Don’t obsess over it. 5) Remember there are more aspects to good health than the physical body.. work just as hard on finding your mental, emotional and spiritual happiness too. That way you might realise just how insignificant and unimportant having this stupidly portrayed perfect social media body really is.. While on this topic, delete any account that pops up on your news feeds that gives you any sense of feeling **** about yourself. Friend or not.. Be ruthless for your own well-being. 6) Be grateful for each day you don’t have pain and even the days where you are unwell with man flu, a sore back or a sprained ankle, accept it is **** but be thankful it isn’t life threatening and will go away. 7) Whinge less, people! .. And help each other more. 😎 Give, give, give. It is true that you gain more happiness doing things for others than doing them for yourself. I wish I did this more. Since I have been sick, I have met the most incredibly giving and kind people and been the receiver of the most thoughtful and loving words and support from my family, friends and strangers; More than I could I ever give in return. I will never forget this and will be forever grateful to all of these people. 9) It is a weird thing having money to spend at the end.. when you’re dying. It’s not a time you go out and buy material things that you usually would, like a new dress. It makes you think how silly it is that we think it is worth spending so much money on new clothes and ‘things’ in our lives. Buy your friend something kind instead of another dress, beauty product or jewellery for that next wedding. 1. No-one cares if you wear the same thing twice 2. It feels good. Take them out for a meal, or better yet, cook them a meal. Shout their coffee. Give/ buy them a plant, a massage or a candle and tell them you love them when you give it to them. 10) Value other people’s time. Don’t keep them waiting because you are **** at being on time. Get ready earlier if you are one of those people and appreciate that your friends want to share their time with you, not sit by themselves, waiting on a mate. You will gain respect too! Amen sister. 11) This year, our family agreed to do no presents and despite the tree looking rather sad and empty (I nearly cracked Christmas Eve!), it was so nice because people didn’t have the pressure of shopping and the effort went into writing a nice card for each other. Plus imagine my family trying to buy me a present knowing they would probably end up with it themselves.. strange! It might seem lame but those cards mean more to me than any impulse purchase could. Mind you, it was also easier to do in our house because we had no little kiddies there. Anyway, moral of the story- presents are not needed for a meaningful Christmas. Moving on. 12) Use your money on experiences.. Or at least don’t miss out on experiences because you spent all your money on material ****. 13) Put in the effort to do that day trip to the beach you keep putting off. Dip your feet in the water and dig your toes in the sand. Wet your face with salt water. 14) Get amongst nature. 15) Try just enjoying and being in moments rather than capturing them through the screen of your phone. Life isn’t meant to be lived through a screen nor is it about getting the perfect photo.. enjoy the bloody moment, people! Stop trying to capture it for everyone else. Random rhetorical question. Are those several hours you spend doing your hair and make up each day or to go out for one night really worth it? I’ve never understood this about females 🤔. 16) Get up early sometimes and listen to the birds while you watch the beautiful colours the sun makes as it rises. 17) Listen to music.. really listen. Music is therapy. Old is best. 18) Cuddle your dog. Far out, I will miss that. 19) Talk to your friends. Put down your phone. Are they doing okay? 20) Travel if it’s your desire, don’t if it’s not. 21) Work to live, don’t live to work. Seriously, do what makes your heart feel happy. 22) Eat the cake. Zero guilt. 23) Say no to things you really don’t want to do. 24) Don’t feel pressured to do what other people might think is a fulfilling life.. you might want a mediocre life and that is so okay. 25) Tell your loved ones you love them every time you get the chance and love them with everything you have. 26) Also, remember if something is making you miserable, you do have the power to change it – in work or love or whatever it may be. Have the guts to change. You don’t know how much time you’ve got on this earth so don’t waste it being miserable. I know that is said all the time but it couldn’t be more true. Anyway, that’s just this one young gals life advice. Take it or leave it, I don’t mind! Oh and one last thing, if you can, do a good deed for humanity (and myself) and start regularly donating blood. It will make you feel good with the added bonus of saving lives. I feel like it is something that is so overlooked considering every donation can save 3 lives! That is a massive impact each person can have and the process really is so simple. Blood donation (more bags than I could keep up with counting) helped keep me alive for an extra year - a year I will be forever grateful that I got to spend it here on Earth with my family, friends and dog. A year I had some of the greatest times of my life. ..’Til we meet again. Hol Xoxo”