15 replies to this topic

[soimpossible]

Where do I begin! Well THANKSGIVING... I worked that day long story but everyone kept asking me what plans I had for that day I said I will be eating my JENNY CRAIG FOOD. YES I'm that committed!!! I have no family here so its not like stuffing my face with holiday food meant anything to me so I stick to my Jenny.

But Lately who I thought was one of my best friends is probably the most impossible and irritant person to deal with. Let me tell tell you this girl is ADHD she gains NO WEIGHT and she is ADDICTED to working out so yes she is VERY THIN. However her sister struggles with keeping her weight the same way I do. But I've notice the same patter when her sister was dieting a while back she was IMPOSSIBLE and will always get mad at situations where her sister didn't showed up for FOOD EVENTS yes this girl is always going out for dinner parties and if you are not there she gets annoying like you are not her friend. I feel that instead of a friend she is becoming a FOOD BULLY!!!! Her sister felt the same way, reason why she decided not to attend to any activities that involved food.

Unfortunately I NOW understand why! Ever since I started Jenny her demeanor towards me not going places because they are dinners and tons of wine which i will like to indulge in I decided not to go out. This has her going BULLISTIC and PSYCHO towards me. I told her I need supportive friends people who are encouraging into my goal of losing weight if you want to spend time with me choose a venue or an activity that doesn't involved food.

Now there is this person I really haven't seen in a while and they decided to meet at Chilis she found out I accepted that info but for me yes its different because the people that would be in that get together are supportive people and I will not be there eating and drinking I will be there just for the conversation. The difference is that they are NOT Bullies, they are not going to make me drink or eat they respect my decision of joining JENNY, something that she doesn't respect.

For that reason alone I have decided not to participate of the HOLIDAYS because they all involved food and drinks and people that will bully me into trying stuff and Im sorry but I am not the type of person that wants to try something I want to eat it all if I like it. I know that yes my friends probably will hate the word JENNY but I really want to be thin!!! And Im almost at the goal I said when I joined Jenny the first time. I only been in the program again for 3 weeks and so far Im 7 lbs maybe 5lbs away from my goal which was 130 obviously that was my goal when i started and I weight 150 thats 20lbs. My real goal is 120 but one goal at a time. Im so close I wish they were more supportive. Im finally starting to wear size 7 pants I haven't seen that number in years and when I saw it was probably for 2 months and went back to size 9. Ideally i want to be a size 4-5 Im 5'2" I want guys to look at me and not see the fat one of the group. I want to see this guy and impress him next time he see's me, I want to probably wear a bikini for the first time in my life I want to be comfortable in my own skin!!! But in order to do all that I have to remain in JENNY and with people that are none supportive I feel angry and held back.

[FitIsFun]

Good for you! Bullies (food or otherwise) can only have power over you if you let them . I feel for you tho, it stinks that your friend is acting that way to you but I think its more about not understanding what your going through than simply not caring. To her, you not joining her in these events is "you" being selfish. She seems to never have had a problem with her weight. Obviously that's pretty silly of her to think but not everybody takes the time to step in someone else s shoes. What I do, is turn the table around on them. Instead of thinking about and portraying Jenny as a "diet", portray it as a lifestyle change. If she asks why your always on a diet, tell her your not on one Let her know you intend and have committed to getting fit, healthy and to a place where your confident, and weather its jenny your choosing to eat or sticking to 1 glass of wine vs 4, who is she to try to convince you to be unhappy? Phrased like that, It may slow her down enough to think about why your making your choices!

Fitisfun

[I Called Jenny]

OK, a couple of things.

First, I'm glad someone else writes posts as long as mine! LOL

Second, congrats on getting soooooo close to your first goal. I think you look AMAZING!!!

As for your friend, well, it can be a couple of things.

FitIsFun is right that the only way someone can bully you is if you let them. (Believe me, I've learned this the hard way and later in life and I am MUCH, MUCH older than you.)

But there can be a couple of other things going on with her.

As you said, she doesn't have a weight problem so it's possible, even if she knows her sister has the problem, she just might not "get it."

My husband is thin and always has been. Over the last few years, he's developed a sweet tooth but he's still very slim.

While he is EXTREMELY supportive of me and knows how hard I have to work at losing weight/keeping it off, he still doesn't totally "get it" because it's not a problem that he has ever had to deal with. On the other hand, he has his own "demons" that he deals with so in that sense, maybe he can understand a little better.

My best friend is also SKINNY. She eats like a truck driver and never gains an ounce. She understands that I struggle but she can't actually relate (although she is supportive and does sympathize with my struggles) when I'm struggling with food.

So it's possible that your friend doesn't "get it." You'll have to decide if she falls into that category. She might not be able to understand why you (and her sister) can't exhibit a bit of self control and still go out to these food events and just watch what you eat and drink.

BTW, you ARE going to have to develop those skills.

Yes, I know you're on the "I've gotta lose it" path but there will come a time when you will reach your ultimate goal (and at the rate you're going, it will probably be much sooner than later) and at that time you are going to have to get used to eating "real" food and resisting the urge to eat or drink more than you should. In fact, especially since you're so close to goal, you really should start trying to show some of that restraint now. (Yes, I read your post about being able to pass up sweets now, so good for you.)

But there will be MANY occasions that are going to happen, especially when you start dating again that are going to involve food and drink. So maybe now is a good time to start OCCASIONALLY venturing into those food situations so that you see how you can handle yourself. Don't make the Jenny food a "crutch" unless you plan to eat it for the rest of your life.

There are some people on maintenance who do no Jenny food. Actually, when I initially lost the 45 lbs. and was maintaining, I was one of them. I just learned that sometimes I had to walk away from food, tell people who tried to "force" food on me, "Thanks, I'll get some in a little while," or "Yes, I tried it. So yummy!" Yeah, it's a lie, but it's usually an acceptable one.

There are people who stay on JC food during the week and eat "normal" on weekend. And there are other combinations too.

Now I mix JC food with "regular" food and just watch portions and the scale to keep on track.

Now, of course, regarding your "friend," there is another possibility. She is jealous.

Hey, you're a VERY pretty girl but some girls like having a "fat" friend so they look good.

There was a comedian who once said, "It wasn't until my wedding day that I realized why I thought my bride-to-be was so beautiful as she was walking down the aisle. It was because she had all fat, ugly bridesmaids and friends."

So it's possible, she just might not like having you as her "competition."

And, even if you're not at your ideal weight YET, believe me, honey, you ARE competition - and she gets that. The problem is that you still DON'T GET IT.

Yes, you want to be thinner. Yes, you want "your old body" back. But you are still a STUNNING girl! Truly! But, you really need to start working on your confidence.

Confidence has nothing to do with weight. Too many of us still look in a mirror and see "a fat girl." It's what's in our head and we don't see what others see. You have to start having better view of how you look to the rest of us.

You want to meet Mr. Right (or even Mr. Right Now), then start shining FROM WITHIN. Trust me on this one, if he's a great guy, he won't care whether you need to lose a few pounds. He's going to be knocked out by that face and great personality of yours. (I speak from experience here. )

So keep up the great job you're doing, but cut yourself some slack. You work on letting you shine from within and do the best you can on the diet and the rest will fall into place.

If you want to go to parties and you can show some restraint, go! That's what life is all about. It's about the people (just like the friends you met at Chili's). It's not about the food. Have fun! That's your "job." You're young, you're beautiful and you deserve the experience of going out and enjoying all of it.

BTW, who is that GORGEOUS guy in your "before" picture? He didn't seem to "mind" that you were heavier.

Phyllis

[soimpossible]

Thank you guys so much for your points of view I do get it that might look selfish of me but why it seems like she is the only person that isn't supportive of people trying to stay fit by eating less or eating right she is all about the gym and PIG OUT lol. I love her to death and she has her own issues with other things in which I've help her deal with it all I just don't get why this is so hard on her. I don't plan on staying in this forever I started in August and in a month I had to quit I spent september and august on my own and I managed to lose 6lbs eating right and portion control I started again because of my goal I'm focus and I want to make sure that for my bday in January I look how I want to look Im going to be 33 years old but I want to look better than when I was 23 that's my mission. That's why I'm doing this hardcore i blend in my own foods for breakfasts and I will eat half of a sweet for, time to it,e but it's different because there is no one bulling me into finishing the sweet or having and extra glass of wine that's why I, avoiding her in particular. I tried to explain her it was more than for the looks my family has a lot of obese people and my grandad died of diabetes complications she knows all that I want to be healthy now before I get older n get all this health issues.

Oh the guy in the pic is a really good friend and no he doesn't discriminate even when I was the biggest I've ever been because that's probably the biggest his been too and we were equally unsatisfied with our weight. But besides all that I am happy almost 15lbs are gone clothes fit n my fat clothes are all taken out of the hangers and folded for my sister maybe she will get motivated into fitting in them she is also doing Jenny but she has a very very slow metabolism and she is at 200lbs so maybe for me are huge clothes but for her means a smaller size of pants and shirts n might motivate her.

I will hang in there and keep striving for getting my new pants looser people are noticing change at work they say it all the time and ive gain a couple of unusual male visitors in my office lol which leads to the fact I'm not wearing baggy clothes anymore lol

You look great!! But honestly you didn't look bad in your before pic

[I Called Jenny]

soimpossible, on 28 November 2011 - 07:33 PM, said:

Thank you guys so much for your points of view I do get it that might look selfish of me but why it seems like she is the only person that isn't supportive of people trying to stay fit by eating less or eating right she is all about the gym and PIG OUT lol. I love her to death and she has her own issues with other things in which I've help her deal with it all I just don't get why this is so hard on her.

Then just understand this. You can't change how another person thinks or feels. The only person you have control over is you. So it's up to you to decide whether or not you are going to be bothered by her reactions, if you want to tell her to "lay off" because you're doing this for you, or if you just want to ignore her.

She doesn't "control" you. You control you!

And, yes, I wish she was more supportive but she's not. Either deal with it directly or ignore it. Your choice.

Phyllis

[Blessed4Life2]

I Called Jenny, on 28 November 2011 - 07:43 PM, said:

Either deal with it directly or ignore it. Your choice.

Phyllis

....and SO BE IT!!!!, says Mrs. Phyllis. <hands on hips....3 snaps and a "Z">

btw soimpossible, you kind of favor Snooki in the last pic...wahhhhhhhh

[CMECRZN]

Blessed4Life2, on 28 November 2011 - 07:46 PM, said:

....and SO BE IT!!!!, says Mrs. Phyllis. <hands on hips....3 snaps and a "Z">

btw soimpossible, you kind of favor Snooki in the last pic...wahhhhhhhh

TOO FUNNY!!! I just can't get the picture out of my head Melissa of you doing just THAT!!! ROFLMAO!!!

[Blessed4Life2]

CMECRZN, on 28 November 2011 - 07:55 PM, said:

TOO FUNNY!!! I just can't get the picture out of my head Melissa of you doing just THAT!!! ROFLMAO!!!

lol, I dont know WHAT i would do w/out these lil emoticons/smiley fella's to help me express myself. hehe

[I Called Jenny]

Blessed4Life2, on 28 November 2011 - 08:08 PM, said:

lol, I dont know WHAT i would do w/out these lil emoticons/smiley fella's to help me express myself. hehe

Yes, it IS difficult for me to write my professional stuff without wanting to resort to emoticons. I actually have to write well enough to exactly express my thoughts. That's not fair! LOL

Anyway, it did strike me funny having you picture me that way. I actually didn't mean it to sound as "stern" as it probably came out. Oops. Sorry about that.

Phyllis

[Blessed4Life2]

I Called Jenny, on 28 November 2011 - 10:11 PM, said:

Anyway, it did strike me funny having you picture me that way. I actually didn't mean it to sound as "stern" as it probably came out. Oops. Sorry about that.

Phyllis

lol, its not so much how I picture YOU like that......its more how I picture myself saying that, but I just had to bust your chops AGAIN!....sorry, couldnt resist. hehe

[I Called Jenny]

Blessed4Life2, on 28 November 2011 - 10:15 PM, said:

lol, its not so much how I picture YOU like that......its more how I picture myself saying that, but I just had to bust your chops AGAIN!....sorry, couldnt resist. hehe

Yeah, "paybacks" are h-ll!

Phyllis

[soimpossible]

hehe way too funny yeah I'm actually the snappy one so I told her to lay off and if she doesnt like it too bad guess she wont be seeing much of me this "holidays" If she accepts the fact that Im doing this and becomes supportive good if not then too bad for her might have to find a new buddy. In the meantime I will stay around the people taht support me.

And OMG don't compare me to TRASH SNOOKI please!!! It's terrible I dunno why people kep saying that unfortunately is not the first time I hear it. I think that girl is probably the worse role model for the young generation out there. Not educated and yet making more money than people with higher education will see in their whole life sorry LOL i really can't stand the chic LOL

[Blessed4Life2]

soimpossible, on 29 November 2011 - 05:46 AM, said:

And OMG don't compare me to TRASH SNOOKI please!!! It's terrible I dunno why people kep saying that unfortunately is not the first time I hear it. I think that girl is probably the worse role model for the young generation out there. Not educated and yet making more money than people with higher education will see in their whole life sorry LOL i really can't stand the chic LOL

YIKES! Sorry I struck a nerve. You ONLY favor her in that ONE pic b/c thats how she is always looking when she whines. Believe me, you look nothing like her in the other pic.

Yea, I totally agree.....she is a horrible role model, but ya know what? I cant help myself, I still watch Jersey Shore, lol....just so I can huff 'n puff at their shenanigans, and threaten my daughter with her very life IF she EVER acts like them

[soimpossible]

Lol I just don't like her or their show but I guess I'm old school I'm from the Daria n my so called life era where those shows actually reflect issues we all dealt with at that age. Jersey shore isn't a show teens should even watch only teaches kids to be irresponsible and getting rewarded by acting that way no consequences to their actions but hey that's just me lol. Tomorrow is weight in I really hope the scale is at 135 but something tells me my lady friend is gonna ruin that for me

[I Called Jenny]

soimpossible, on 29 November 2011 - 03:38 PM, said:

Lol I just don't like her or their show but I guess I'm old school I'm from the Daria n my so called life era where those shows actually reflect issues we all dealt with at that age. Jersey shore isn't a show teens should even watch only teaches kids to be irresponsible and getting rewarded by acting that way no consequences to their actions but hey that's just me lol. Tomorrow is weight in I really hope the scale is at 135 but something tells me my lady friend is gonna ruin that for me

You're gorgeous, thin (yes you are!) and responsible. Tell me again why you haven't found Mr. Right or that asked that gorgeous guy friend of yours out on a date?

Phyllis

[soimpossible]

Well I haven't found MR Right because every person I meet i found a flaw and I also found so many flaws on myself that unless I am happy with myself I cant be happy with anything else. Plus i havent found a person that wants to be with me for the right reasons. The guy in the Pic is a really good friend and we did had our thing but maturity level is lacking on his part but yet again can't expect much from a guy that is 5-6 years younger than me. He is a lot of fun to be around with but we are on the same page when it comes to relationships they are over rated.