Applecow, first, congrats on your upcoming wedding!
However, we really need to give you an attitude adjustment, girlfriend. Even if you don't lose the weight, please DO NOT refer to yourself as a fat cow!

You should be A LOT nicer to yourself than that.
I applaud you wanting to do the program so you can look your best on your wedding day but I've been a wedding/event planner for more than 25 years and I don't care what size the bride is, as long as she's happy with herself, she's going to glow and look beautiful to everyone. (And, no, that's not just dribble I'm spouting, it's the truth.)
So, you're looking for inspiration and you don't think your wedding is enough of an incentive. OK, fine. How about wanting to lose some weight so you can feel better about yourself and more confident when you start going out looking for jobs? Confidence is a very powerful tool for marketing yourself for ANY type of work. And that confidence comes not only from knowing that you can handle the job but also that you are confident in the way you look and feel. And since you're so down on yourself right now, I suspect that you're not going to make the best impression in an interview...even if it's only on the phone.
As for your dress, explain that you want to order a size 12 or 14 because you're losing the weight. It's always easier for them to taper a dress than it is for them to let it out.
The other thing is, don't worry so much about the size of the dress. You don't wear the size tag on the outside! LOL And bridal dresses for some unknown reason tend to run small anyway. (You'd think they'd run big to make brides happier but in most cases, designers don't do that.) However, ask your wedding gown consultant how a particular dress runs (smaller, larger or true to size).
Find a dress that is in a flattering design and go with an open mind. I've had more brides shocked that when they went in for a dress with a style in mind, they often discovered that their "vision" was totally wrong for them and they looked much better and THINNER in other styles that were better for their figure.
Hopefully that helps. Hang in there. If you REALLY work at this, you CAN lose a bunch of weight before your wedding. Just give yourself the chance to be the most beautiful bride you want (and can) be.
Phyllis