5 replies to this topic

[DebbieRP]

Has anyone here ever dated anyone significantly younger than them? I am almost 48 and my BF is 36. We are having some challenges, mostly because he has always had this dream in his life of getting married someday and having children. Since I can't give him this, I can no longer have children, I feel like he is always holding back part of himself from jumping all in to the relationship. We have talked about it, but still he holds back some of his inner self. I can feel it. We know each other for a year and started dating about 6 months ago. He is also my BEST friend.
Just wondering if anyone has ever experienced this.

[termessi]

Has anyone here ever dated anyone significantly younger than them? I am almost 48 and my BF is 36. We are having some challenges, mostly because he has always had this dream in his life of getting married someday and having children. Since I can't give him this, I can no longer have children, I feel like he is always holding back part of himself from jumping all in to the relationship. We have talked about it, but still he holds back some of his inner self. I can feel it. We know each other for a year and started dating about 6 months ago. He is also my BEST friend.
Just wondering if anyone has ever experienced this.

Hi, sorry this is late but hope things are improving for you and your bf.

I always dated younger guys...my last relationship of 6 1/2 years was with a guy 7 years younger. I know he wanted children as he was 46 and I was 53 and could not. But he said it wouldn't matter but who knows? We are not together anymore for reasons OTHER than children.

Then I just dated a 47 year old and I'm 60 and to me it was too much of an age difference. I couldn't handle it and he already had children so I guess that wasn't an issue there either.

I do hope you can work things out. Love always finds a way.

(((HUGS))

Terri

[DebbieRP]

Thank you Terri. I am taking it one step at a time. I realized that much of this is my own fears of getting hurt again.

[termessi]

Thank you Terri. I am taking it one step at a time. I realized that much of this is my own fears of getting hurt again.

totally understand...as I'm feeling the same way...keep in touch!

Terri

[mamajimmy]

My boyfriend is 9 years younger than me.
We have been together for a few years now.
We have a son who turned 3 in April, and bought a house together.
I think of him as 'husband' more than 'boyfriend' though.
This is the first and only time I have been with someone younger than me.
So, slightly different situation than you but still.

Have you had a heart to heart with him about it recently?
I am no expert, but I really believe in getting things out.
Make sure he realizes that you love him but children are not possible.
Would you consider adoption?

good luck

[DebbieRP]

My boyfriend is 9 years younger than me.
We have been together for a few years now.
We have a son who turned 3 in April, and bought a house together.
I think of him as 'husband' more than 'boyfriend' though.
This is the first and only time I have been with someone younger than me.
So, slightly different situation than you but still.

Have you had a heart to heart with him about it recently?
I am no expert, but I really believe in getting things out.
Make sure he realizes that you love him but children are not possible.
Would you consider adoption?

good luck

Thank you, he knew going into this that children are physically an impossibility. We have had a few heart to hearts about this and I have given him an out by saying that if this is a deal breaker he needs to get out NOW. He is still here. He knows how I feel and the limitations and yes I would consider adoption BUT my oldest child is 23, youngest 17. Time will tell.